Bucksnort On The Catwalk

I went to Lowe’s Building Supply early yesterday morning to be there when they opened because I needed some supplies to get started on a porch-painting project.

But first.... I fall a lot. I have some kind of problem with my propioception or kinesthesis or something or other, and as a result I don’t lift my feet up high enough; not as high as I think I am. That means that I’ll be walking along and I'll see something I have to step over. I’ll lift my foot high enough to clear it, but instead I trip over it. I can’t seem to gauge distances with these two particular appendages (my legs).

So I’ve decided to become a supermodel.

Runway (catwalk) supermodels lift their feet quite high when they walk and I figure it’s a good way to remember to do that myself. I participated in the First Annual Lowe’s Home Improvement But First Fashion Show yesterday morning... funded and produced entirely by Bucksnort & Co. And since the only other people at Lowe's were salespeople and contactors, of course I was the only one who participated! I was breath taking. I strutted up and down the catwalks (aisles) and I worked it and worked it and worked it and it worked! I didn’t fall once.

Oh snap…. you’ll have to excuse me. My neighbor is playing hip hop music. It’s very loud. I can’t hear the melody or the harmony or the lyrics, but I can hear the bassline and it sounds exactly like the bassline to David Bowie’s “Fashion”. So as you can imagine, the beat of the catwalk calls to me. I’m about to begin my haute couture strut from the diningroom to the livingroom. Please nod your appreciation for my statuesque grace and cool composure as I pass by your front row seat.

(Thus ends the first annual "But First" Annual Fashion Report.)